Minutes from meeting number 1210
Minutes of the 1210th meeting of the
Manchester Pickwick Club held at the Moorside Social Club on 16th November, 2011.
The 1210th meeting of the Manchester Pickwick Club commenced at 8.01 p.m. wi1 all members being welcomed by Mr Pickwick who suggested that he was inclined 1 be lenient with the fines this evening, then proceeded to disprove that comment.
Dodson volunteered to act as P.O.C, probably to ensure that the cost of drinks was controlled but there was no improvement in the administrative proceedures for dealing with the drinks order and some time was spent trying to identify who wanted what.
The usual knockabout continued whilst the drinks order was being collected with Pickwick suggesting that it would be unfair to proceed whilst Dodson was out of th room - members thought it more likely that Pickwick had identified Dodson as the target for the evenings fines box and couldn't fine him if he wasn't present. There was some delay before the drinks order arrived so various members were invited to entertain their colleagues whilst waiting and a number of risque stories followed which resulted in the appropriate fines. It was suggested that the delay in obtaining drinks was further proof that Dodson had volunteered to act as POC to reduce the number of rounds which could be consumed and, consequently, the total outlay to the club
It was during this intermission that members realised that Pickwick was not wearin his badge of office and suggested that as his actions prior to that moment were illeg all fines should be refunded, a suggestion met with scorn by Pickwick who quickly donned the badge of office. (The term 'quickly' should be read with tongue in chee because he had to find the badge first and that took some time).
Eventually the drinks arrived and the meeting was allowed to proceed with Tupmai being asked to introduce the member's characters. He suggested that individual members ought to be able to describe their own character and Pickwick wouldn't e able to do this because he didn't know his character. Pickwick refuted this commen saying that he did know his character but that it was the job of the D.C. not Pickwic to describe the characters. Tupman responded by saying he didn't know whether Pickwick was genuine or not and went on, as an aside, to say he had recently visite* a public house in Berwick on Tweed which bore a plaque indicating that Charles Dickens had stayed there. He then performed his usual excellent introduction of members characters.
Following the introduction of members the minutes were read and it was noticed th there were a number of derogatory remarks about Pickwick's level of fining members for imaginary offences. Pickwick claimed that the minutes were probably actionable and that he was taking legal advice about the possibility of taking the matter to Court; in any case, they came in the category of fiction rather than fact; Mivins responded that if they were fiction there was no case to answer but that his minutes were occasionally true - he was not prepared to say which items were true and which were 'iffy'. It was at this stage of the proceedings that Dodson announced that he had recently returned from Spain and, as usual, had attempted to obtain a supply of 'Miau' for Jingle. Unfortunately, there was no Miau available; possibly because of the apparen aphrodisiac effect of Miau, as evidenced by Jingles eagerness to get hold of a suppl; and the fear of a massive increase in birthrate in Spain, it appeared to have been withdrawn and replaced by a product called 'Aibo', Dodson had brought three tins for jingle to try out and it was hoped that Jingle would report back to the next meeting about it's effectiveness or whether it had been introduced to counter the effects of Miau. Dodson also reported that he had earlier received a text message from Smangle, who was on holiday in Goa, indicating that because of the time difference, when the 9.00p.m. toast to absent members was called, he would be fast asleep so he was performing the toast at 9.00p.m. Goa time which would be late afternoon in the U.K.
The Secretary reported he had received a note from Rick Bravo in America giving details of their Christmas meeting on 9th December; he said he would reply with Christmas greetings from us to them.
After the meal, which was lamb hot pot, the P.O.R & I was performed by Snodgrass and was taken from Chapter 29 of the book; the reading was excellent, the inquisition less so with the result that all were fined for failing to answer their question correctly. As the Inquisitor, Snodgrass made the usual donation to the fines
box. .
Following the P.O.R & I Dodson was once again fined for some trivial offence and complained that he was being persecuted by Pickwick who smiled and asked the Minute Writer to record Dodson's complaint - and that was as far as it went!
Names were taken for the Christmas Dinner on 2nd December and the menu was agreed. Members would be collected by coach at the Red Lion at 7.15p.m. on the night with the return scheduled for 1215a.m. Grummer reminded members about the bicentenary dinner at Nantwich on 11th February, 2012 and asked that all names be with him before the January meeting.
The raffle proved to be an even bigger fiddle than usual; Pickwick, invited to draw the first ticket drew his own and followed this by drawing his vice-chairmans ticket,
he. in turn drew the ticket of the organiser, Dodson, The raffle no longer even pretends to be fair.
Proposing the vote of thanks to Pickwick and the vice-chairman, Grummer said it was quite noticeable that none of the members above the nick had been fined whilst those below the nick had kept the fines box busy. The meeting should be free flowing but could only be described as abysmal. The vice-chairman had been quite good and Pickwick could do well to take lessons from him rather than blundering on as he does. The meeting simply hadn't jelled and he felt it was unfair to request a vote of thanks for that performance. Srtodgrass seconded the vote of thanks by suggesting Pickwick had faced a difficult meeting with Dodson, Grummer, Tupman and jingle making it impossible to perform properly. Despite this he had managed to keep the meeting flowing efficiently. Good neet owd friends was sung by all and was followed by the National Anthem The raffle raised £5,00 whilst the Fines Box contained £5.18.